Calliope Center

The Time Between

Posted by Prudence Tippins on 30 March 2011 | 2 Comments

I returned late last night from the Enneagram workshop in upstate New York and woke this morning to find that I have not missed the coming of Spring here in Wisconsin. The few brave, early arriving birds sit quite visibly in the brown, leafless branches of the trees. Everywhere you look, it's brown in all its shades.  Not as joy-inspiring as the coming stage of green, but a necessary phase, nonetheless. As I look out the window of the Calliope Center now, I see a deer seeking tender shoots in the grass by the labyrinth. This is not the hart of myth, urgently beckoning the knight into the woods to find adventure. Just a hungry deer looking rather lazily for nourishment.

I've been through a winter of my own recently. No external trauma, but a deep season of recognizing some of my own patters of behavior and thought that have brought me and others grief over the years.  I don't hesitate to feel grateful for this time of darkness and depth: after all, it's through these times we find our true nature. But I'll admit it feels better to be on the other side of it (assuming I am).

And now, I'm feeling much like the landscape here -- in transition. I'm not ready to bloom again quite yet; not ready to rush back out and take my new place in the world.  I need a plateau on which to take a rest before I begin once again to climb. My self-preservation instinct can come front-and-center now, taking on the role of the nursemaid who tends to the hero after an especially fierce battle. 

Just as there is much going on under the brown grass and in the still trees, despite appearances, my time of rejuvenation will include a lot of activity. I'll be digesting the bounty of information I just received at the Enneagram training and putting all the pieces together to create my own multi-faceted trainings. There are books to read to prepare for the next cycle of the Wheel of Initiation, writing workshops to create, and gardens to tend. But mostly, I'll be breathing, noticing my belly, heart, and mind centers, and generally being present; being gentle.

For the Type One, plateaus can be difficult. I definitely find it so. So many social connections to be made; important work to be done! But everyone knows that taking care of oneself is extremely important when one endeavors to serve others. So, if I seem a little on the "brown" side for the next month or so, know that Spring is in my heart and the daffodils are coming. I just need to graze for a little while.