Calliope Center

Writing Your Story

Posted by Prudence Tippins on 5 July 2010 | 4 Comments

In the Wheel of Initiation course, participants are in the midst of writing and presenting their stories to the group.  This is a sacred ritual, with significant ramifications for personal growth. Why is that, though? What is it about telling one's story that makes such an impact?

Dan P. McAdams, author of The Stories We Live By, tells us it's because our life story is our identity; the process of writing and telling our story is actually a major step in creating our identity. Our story tells us what our life is about, what provides us with meaning and purpose. To know someone well, you must know their story.

What we've noticed in our group is that our stories reveal to us the Essence of who we are. As we write our stories, and as we listen to others' stories, we notice patterns and themes. Often, an archetype is revealed: a warrior, an angel, a wise court jester. Telling our story allows that Essence to surface above the various ego-selves we have created to win approval and love. When this tender part of us emerges, it is like a turtle discarding its shell. We, and those witnesses the emersion, are in awe of the power and beauty of revelation.

Writing your story is also an opportunity to identify the agreements we live by. We might be creating self-fulfilling prophecies with beliefs like, "Everybody leaves me," or "I am not good enough." Seeing how these beliefs and agreements impact our lives, we can decide to change them. Bringing the shadow to the light is an important part of storytelling.

If you have not yet written your story, perhaps these summer months are offering you the warmth and space you need to begin. Start wherever it feels natural to you. Some people begin by telling some of their parents' stories. Others begin in the womb, or at the moment of birth. Try to release any need for accuracy as you tell your story. It's the myth of it that's really important. 

Sometimes, it's useful to begin with an early conflict. In any story, conflict -- either inner or external -- is used to further the plot and explicate character. In our personal myths, conflict shows us where our values lie and what we are willing to fight for. It can also show us where our Essence and our ego diverge. Once you write about your conflict, you may want to allow some healing to happen. Allow your Essence to make contact with the wounded part of you -- the part that was challenged, perhaps, or humiliated, or betrayed. Allow the wounded part to express any feelings, while your Essence simply listens compassionately and lovingly, offering that part deep, nourishing breaths as it emotes. This simple act is surprisingly freeing. You can follow this up by creating a personal shield -- an affirmation that your Essence is eternal and unwounded. 

Another useful (and very enjoyable) exercise is to actually write your story as a mythic journey. Describe the hero or heroine -- you -- as you would find in a book about a fictional character. Have this character go through the stages of the mythic journey: 

Call to Action

Refusal of the Call

Meeting with the Mentor

Crossing the First Threshold

Meeting Tests, Allies, and Enemies

Approach to the Inmost Cave

The Ordeal

The Reward

The Road Back 

The Resurrection

Returning with the Elixir

(These steps are fully explained in Christopher Vogler's The Writer's Journey, but you don't need to read the book to use this structure: it's a familiar one in our culture!)

You can write this using parts of yourself as the various characters (our shadow selves make excellent allies and enemies, for example), or you can write about your external journey. What is the elixir you've returned with? Identifying that is finding your soul's gift to the world -- no small thing!

If you want to start simply, use one or more of the following writing prompts. Write for fifteen to twenty minutes on each one, without letting your pen stop writing. If you get stuck, simply repeat the prompt words until something new comes.

I remember...

I regret...

I am grateful for...

I take with me...

I release...

Any of these prompts can bring up memories from which to begin writing your stories. Write about one incident or start from the beginning and write until you reach the present, but write! The treasure in your stories is waiting for you.